Are you ready for this litmus test?
Everytime we hear in the news about a women wronged there is so much uproar over India's daughter being harmed and the media breaks into a frenzy to capture this angst and horror. Before typing away furiously take a step back and look at the below 10 points and ask yourself if you have said or done this.
1. Look at what she's wearing on the road? People don't know what to wear these days. There must be a rule around that.
2. She's so lucky that she can travel. Her husband " agrees" to " babysit"
3. Don't make your brother do that. He must be tired after sports practice
4. These days not just men but women need a smoke break too. Really don't know where this is heading.
5. Are you sure you can stay back late to complete the deadline? Don't you have a kid/spouse at home waiting for you?
6. Who is the man in your house?
7. You have a daughter right and expecting the second one? I wish and pray that it's a boy!
8. You think she should leave home to do her college? Is it even worth it?
9.Why do you need to support your parents? Your brother can do the needful?
10.She's hardly seen in school or comes for pickup. Think her priorities are elsewhere.
Before you react, as a man or woman if you have said this or thought on these lines and even now wonder what's the big deal read on..
1. Look at what she's wearing on the road? People don't know what to wear these days. There must be a rule around that.- Should I explain this ? Beauty is on the eyes of the beholder and if you don't see it shut your eyes please.
2. She's so lucky that she can travel. Her husband " agrees" to " babysit"- It's called parenting duh!
3. Don't make your brother do that. He must be tired after sports practice-- Brother or sister don't differentiate.
4. These days not just men but women need a smoke break too. Really don't know where this is heading.-- My opinion is both don't but clearly no double standards. Extrapolate to drinking if needed.
5. Are you sure you can stay back late to complete the deadline? Don't you have a kid/spouse at home waiting for you?-- Assumptions again. The guy in your team may want to go home for the exact same reason so don't assume? Rather if there was an issue women or men will speak up.
6. Who is the man in your house?-- Change it ! It's been said so long. Who's the man or woman in the house shouldn't hint at one-upmanship.
7. You have a daughter right and expecting the second one? I wish and pray that it's a boy!-- Sisters are the best and so are brothers . No difference please.
8. You think she should leave home to do her college? Is it even worth it?-- Unless it's an affordability issue or misguided career options don't ask this question for a girl.
9.Why do you need to support your parents? Your brother can do the needful? - Daughters don't get away with not taking care of their parents. Neither do sons.
10.She's hardly seen in school or comes for pickup. Think her priorities are elsewhere.-Women are probably guilty of saying this more and if you have ever commented saying the dad is never in school then let's talk.
I am not talking about major policy level changes here but minute ones you can start with. Try and be mindful of creating an equal ecosystem where girls are not looked at differently. This isn't any solution but just an observation. As much as women , the men need to break these stereotypes of stay at home dad and dad who bakes for us to get to a society where roles aren't gender based and somewhere equality isn't just a lip service.
Agree? Then tell me your favorite one?
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